Holiday Hijinks, with Knitting

Actually, "hijinks" might be too strong a word choice here, but I really like the word "hijinks" so I used it. I have a list that I keep of words that I like, because I like words and I like lists, so that makes sense to me. Some random words from my list: pith, conflagration, vim and foible...but I digress.

I can tend to get a little freaked out about holidays. (If you examine that sentence, and remove the superfluous cushions, you'll see: I get freaked out about holidays.) Maybe it's the perfectionist people-pleaser in me, but whatever the cause, holidays get to me. We took a "holiday quiz" a few years ago and the kids picked Halloween as their favorite holiday because Mom doesn't get stressed about Halloween. Halloween requires virtually nothing from me and the expectation levels are healthy and I love pumpkins, so yeah, Halloween is pretty much stress-free. This was pretty enlightening to me, as I assumed that Christmas would top their Favorite Holiday list, but it turns out that Christmas tops the list for Holidays That Stress Mom Out. (Why is that even a list?)

It's true. Christmas can be one long session of nightmare workaholic perfectionist guilt: cards, gifts, shopping, movies, parties, performances, outfits, cookies, food, etc. I know this will sound very Grinch-like, but wow can we cram one more thing into that month? And as it is now mid-October all this holiday madness is only mere days away and I'm exhausted already. What's that? You, too? I knew I wasn't alone.

OK, so here's the plan: We are NOT going to panic. Once upon a time, Christmas was something we loved. Like an exciting new knitting project that over time loses its momentum, Christmas needs to be dug out of the bag under the bed and faced head on.

Remember how we purged projects and yarn in Finish For Fall? It felt good to focus and know what was worth taking the time to finish (beaded scarf we hate, NO; socks for hubby, YES). We are going to make a list, several lists if needed. Examine the holidays. What stresses you out? What should you keep? What should you never ever, under any circumstances, do again during the holiday season? And my favorite: What would a stress-free holiday look like? (It looks like Halloween, but I'm pretty sure they won't let me celebrate that in October AND December, too. It's pretty much a one-shot deal.) All of those perfect holidays we see in magazines and on Pinterest and HGTV are not going to happen for us because we are not a full-time staff of decorators, seamstresses and cooks. Unless you in fact are a staff of such, in which case, go for it.

I know that you just can't spring A Different Christmas This Year on your unsuspecting family. I've tried it and believe me, you don't want to go there. This will take strategy and preparedness and a plan. In the long run, if you are happier, more relaxed and actually able to enjoy your holiday, the family will come around, provided you first ease them into it.

Here are some tips for calming the hijinks in your holiday. They are knitting-related because that's what this blog is supposed to be about...

• Do not try to cast on a project after November 1 for giving in December. Madness.
• Do try to knit a little bit every day.  It's your hobby and it brings you pleasure. Don't neglect it till January.  Don't neglect YOU till January, either.
• Don't laugh in the face of the friend who offers to pay you to knit a sweater for their co-worker's Christmas gift. This may be your first impulse, but curb it in the spirit of the holiday. Politely but firmly thank them for their confidence in your abilities, but decline the offer. Then you can laugh, just not in their face.
• Don't be upset if you can't finish a holiday gift in time (which we all know you started before Nov. 1, right?). My sweet friend Dianne has proof that even an unfinished gift is well-loved.
• Do try to remember that you once anticipated the holiday season with excitement, not dread. Like rediscovering neglected old yarn that you loved when you bought it, find a purpose for the holiday that will make it fun again.

Christmas and other holidays are not bad, they just need dusting off and refurbishing. Underneath all of the unrealistic expectations, holidays still have some vim, they needn't turn into a conflagration of stress and accentuate all our foibles.

2008. Seems like yesterday.

The pith, the essence of it all is this:

Even if you don't have kids, the people you spend your holidays with aren't getting any younger (and neither are you, but you look marvelous, so don't let it get you down). If we can just figure out how to spend less time trying to put Martha Stewart out of a job, we will be able to find the time to tell someone they are special. And isn't that what the holiday hijinks are about after all?

SAFF Bound, Indigo To-Go

Here at KnitOasis Central, we've been hard at work preparing some lovely knitting indigo kits for sale at SAFF, The Southeastern Animal Fiber Fair.

Every year, farmers, yarn merchants, spinners, dyers, and assorted crafts people and small business owners gather to teach, learn, compete, share, mingle and more at the Western North Carolina Agricultural Center in Fletcher, NC. Last year I made it for one day and was so impressed with the atmosphere of creativity and camaraderie. There was so much to see and do and buy.

My friend Pat Lorenz at Bird Mountain Creations invited me to be part of her booth this year (#72 in the McGough Arena) and I'm planning on having a fantastic time for the following reasons:

• Pat is a hoot and a half. When you meet her, you'll see what I mean. I will also be surrounded by her amazing creations. Art for daysssss.....
• I will get to see lots of lovely folks that I only ever see at events like this.
• I'll have the chance to show off some indigo, talk about indigo, and hopefully, sell some indigo kits!

This amazing fabric will be lining for hand-knit bag kits. I love it all so much, it's kinda hard to part with any of them!

Are you going to be at SAFF this year? If so, please come see me! No trip to any event is ever complete for me without seeing folks I know and making new friends. Heck, that also applies to going to the grocery store! Please stop by and say hello. If we've yet to meet in person, all the better. I can't wait to see you all!

I'll have two kits available: The Charleston Indigo Scarf kit (includes pattern and 500 yards of 100% cotton yarn, hand-dyed with natural indigo) and the Indigo To-Go Accessory Bag kit (includes pattern, zipper and 100% cotton yarn and fabric, both hand-dyed with natural indigo). The bag is a brand new pattern and will be available for the first time at SAFF!

100% cotton, 100% natural indigo, 100% special.

A Beautiful Day for Beautiful Blue

Somewhere along the way I lost track of how many indigo workshops I've conducted at the Charleston Museum. Today I counted and the one we just held on Saturday, October 4 was number six! I feel in some ways as though I've never NOT been conducting indigo workshops, and at the same time, as though I'll never learn all there is to know about this magical blue dyestuff.

The weather on Saturday was one of those pristine autumn days that make you fall in love with Charleston all over again. It was cool and dry with a light breeze that kept any of our famous Lowcountry mosquitoes away, so we set up just outside the Museum's courtyard breezeway and began prepping the vats for dyeing.

Many of our attendees this time had dyed before or were involved with yarn or fabric on a regular basis. It always pleases me to find a varied group of students with different motivations and perspectives. Everyone who comes to one of my workshops (or knitting classes!) brings so much for me to learn as well. I love my job!

Jan Heister, Curator of Textiles at the Museum showed off items from the collection and gave an entertaining look at the history of indigo in both South Carolina and beyond.

Then it was time to dye! This time we focused on fabric--a canvas bag and a cotton scarf were our playthings and we got some gorgeous results. Each student was encouraged to bring an item from home as well and my favorite was a purple sweatshirt that overdyed to a magnificent blue.

Yes, it was a beautiful day and, as usual, I can't wait to do it all again!

Simple Knitting Tips: Finding your tribe

I recently had a message from a sweet gal who used to knit with us before the military relocated her family.  She was missing her knitting groups here and lamenting the slowness of finding a good one there (and she has moved to an area where there are lots of knitters).

My response to her started me thinking about the importance of finding your knitting tribe.

Sorry you haven’t been able to find your tribe there. Sometimes those things take time because you need the right sort of people to truly be your tribe, ya know? And it’s lonely getting there, but when it happens, you’ll know it was worth the wait and the effort.

As a knitter, you will be able to find things in common with any group of knitters. Finding your tribe goes a bit deeper than that. 

Finding your tribe is not about:

1) Agreeing on all things. Some of the most interesting groups that I fit into are comprised of people from many different walks of life with a variety of different viewpoints about culture, politics and religion.

2) Competing. The best groups are never about unhealthy competition. Egging each other on to finish something or try that hard technique one more time is good and helpful. Trying to be the best of the group is not.

3) Exclusion. Sadly, I have another friend who has had difficulty finding a good knitting group due to the cliques that have formed in our area. If you try a knitting group a couple of times and no one includes you in the conversation, then this is not your tribe.

4) Survivor. Maybe this is just a summary of the other points, but if alliances are being made and folks are getting voted off the island, this won't be a place of sanctuary where you can knit and bond and relax with others.

How to find your tribe:

Now that you know what not to look for, here are some tips on making the most of each visit to a knitting group as you seek out your tribe.

1) Be open. You're meeting new people, right? Expect new things. Suspend judgement and remember what Mama always said about book covers not always revealing the entire plot of the novel.

2) Smile. I shouldn't even have to say this, but I realize that if you're nervous, you may forget that smiling is your passport to the land of friendship. I tried an experiment once where I smiled at the drivers of other cars as I drove through a shopping/residential area (NOT the interstate! Safety first!). I found that not only did most of the drivers return the smile, I felt like I had won the lottery.

3) Introduce yourself. Don't be like me and give a speech about all your qualifications as a knitter and bore people. Just a simple, "Hello, my name is ____ and this is my first (or second) time here," will suffice. Bonus points for asking the person next to you to introduce you to anyone else he/she knows in the group.

4) Ask questions. People love to chat about themselves. Get them talking about what they're knitting, where they're from, what their favorite knitting yarns/needles/techniques/blogs/podcasts/etc. are and you may find that you've made a friend in record time.  They will think YOU are fascinating!

5) Be patient. You may have to try several groups, several times before you find your tribe. Like I told my friend, it's worth the wait. Sometimes, you may even decide that starting your knitting group is a solution to the search for a tribe. Starting a group won't guarantee that the folks who come will all want to be in your tribe, but it's an excellent way to meet new people.

Once you find your tribe, promise me you'll be on the lookout for other knitters seeking a tribe of their own.  A tribe is not a clique, closed with room for no more.  A tribe has room to grow and expand and welcome. You'll need new members because some will move away and some will have life happen that interferes with knitting group times. You'll need new members because you were once seeking that tribe and you remember that feeling of loneliness that comes from being tribe-less.

In knitting, as in life, it's always about the friendships that you make along the way...

Two members of my tribe who have moved out of state and whom I miss bunches! So glad we had the chance to knit together while you lived in Charleston.